July 31, 2013

Who let the introvert into the pageant?

I am supposed to be asleep right now. I'm not supposed to be blogging, but I did sleep for a while and now I have got to write my thoughts out, and maybe someone needs to hear them, or maybe I just write better on my blog. I don't feel well. I'm feeling tired, and sick, and introverted. I'm sorry, I use that word way too much. This will be yet another post where that word is frequented. I am in the small town of Nauvoo, Illinois right now. I always love little towns, and I'm always like "yeah I totally want to move here one day." But frankly its been six days of small towns and open fields and I just want to go home. A lot of time spent meeting new people, and talking and talking and talking to them, and wearing different clothes. I just miss my bedroom, and my fridge, and Neal and Alex. I still have a week to go, a week of talking to people. I'm supposed to be dressed in my pioneer costume talking to people and dancing right now, but I stayed back in this tiny cabin with a headache and sick stomach instead. But tomorrow I've got to be up and at it again, because there is someone I was sent here to talk to, and that means I've got to braid my hair and put on that dress and dance until I find that person. Maybe that is the key to not pushing yourself too hard, as an introvert-- you have to really listen to the spirit, ask who you are supposed to talk to, that way you don't have to use up what you have in you talking to people you weren't sent to affect. Because I want to go on an 18 month mission for my church, in three years, and if I don't push through and learn from this week in Nauvoo, how can I ever make it for that year and a half? Heavenly Father knew exactly what kind of mission prep I needed and He is sure giving it to me.

But for tonight I am going to spend the evening alone, doing familiar, comfortable things. Like blogging, and watching TLC, and eating cold macaroni and cheese evidently, because that's what is in the fridge. And then I'll have recouped and I'll be ready to talk to more people.

Learn more about what I'm talking about here.