August 8, 2013

Let me rephrase that

I'm supposed to be writing 750 words a day. I haven't in forever.
Sometimes I sit down and write 750 words of whatever comes into my brain. I only do it when I feel like it.

I should go work on my Big White Wall. I've missed so many days.
I really like the idea of my Big White Wall project. Sometimes I like the idea more than actually working on it. But some days it brings me lots of joy to go work on it. Today isn't one of those days. I don't feel like going downstairs.

I have been supposed to get a job all summer. I finally am.
Having a job will give me more freedom, that's why my mom has wanted me to get one. She knows I will learn a lot and like it when I have money to save for Italy. Once I actually put myself out there, guess what! I got a job interview. Funny how that works. I am finally excited about my job.

I'm going to stop saying I'm supposed to do something. Time to go fix those sentences.

Today. Was good. Made me nervous. Put an annoying feeling in my stomach. Got just fine again. Will get even better tonight. Stretched me in multiple ways.

The stretching: First thing this morning I had my job interview. I feel great about it. I can't wait to work there. Next I got more practice talking things out with one of my best friends. Sometimes things happen, and you have to talk about them, and sometimes it's scary, or awkward. And you are really tempted to just pretend nothing happened, but it did, and part of being best friends mean you look those things in the face and TALK and work it out. And it really is always better when you do. I'm glad we did. And then I just didn't think about it all and played Just Dance. It had been a while since I'd done that. I didn't realize how much I missed it until I revisited those great moves. Now I'm all stretched out and feeling better.